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Weird Plot Shit
Time is...weird in this game. Timelines Green Timeline 0001 is created. After he does some stuff, he meets the Shopkeeper, who he attempts to pickpocket. This fails, so he attempts to apologize. This also fails, and the Shopkeeper kills him. After reloading the previous save, 0001 this time attempts to befriend the Shopkeeper, which succeeds. Together, they clear the dungeon. Amelia is created. Soon afterwards, she finds a dead crab, which she revives through ELVEN SCIENCE and ELVEN KINDNESS. She names the crab Karkata. The two of them then fall through a trapdoor and get trapped in a cell. Meanwhile, 0001 arrives through a door which just appeared and pulls a lever to release them. He is then stricken by the urge to Synergize with Karkata, and does so. Then, Drizzle Fo' Shizzle the Drow Pimp arrives and uses his Pimp Magic to teleport all three of them away, reducing all but Karkata to critical health. Karkata uses a potion to heal herself and 0001, but neglects to save enough for Amelia. Goblins then begin to invade the room the trio are in. 0001 attempts to hold them off while Karkata finds a magic lamp. She rubs it, and a genie pops out and grants each of the party members one wish. 0001 uses his wish to make himself unable to be swindled by any genie ever, Karkata uses his to transfer Amelia's wish to 0001, and 0001 uses that wish to replace every goblin nearby with a magic lamp. Rubbing a FABULOUS looking lamp, 0001 wishes for the Amelia in that room to have a passive unconscious ability to recover from any injury at an incredibly fast rate compared to most normal humans. The newly-appeared Obviously Heterosexual Genie responds by saying how can you wish for her to be healed...WHEN SHE IS ALREADY DEAD!!! Oh, yeah, and wishes don't work on dead people. Also, if 0001 is to make a wish, then he must sacrifice his immortal soul. 0001 responds by wishing for immunity against all genie rquests and demands, past, present, and future, causing a paradox and reseting the game to the last stable point: the first panel. This creates the BLUE TIMELINE. Karkata is then free to make wishes because it only costs one soul for three wishes, and 0001 has already given up his. Karkata then wishes for Amelia to, if at any point in any timeline she is dead, to instantly come back to life. This naturally creates a paradox, and Karkata and Amelia are transported to the PURPLE TIMELINE. Blue Timeline 0001 is transported back to before his character was "made," and thus 0002, the alternate tieline version of 0001, is created. They emerge from the starting area to find that the dungeon is the exact same, only flipped horizontally. Also, it appears as though the blue timeline is going to intersect with an orange one in the near future. In addition, once the Pimp arrives, the end of the universe will be unable to be averted. After some tomfoolery in the dungeon, 0001 and 0002 find 0003 and Amoria from the Orange Timeline, who reveal the awful truth... they are all characters in a computer game! Thus, the four of them team up to save the universe, or at least export their data before it ends. Later, they find two savepints; however, it is only enough to export the data of two characters. While 0001 and 0003 discuss which of them to export, if any at all, Karkata, now a genie, shows up. The party wastes two of their Karkata wishes before deciding not to make the third and keep Karkata as a party member. 0002 then attempts to eat a save point, but accidentally is exported into the real world. 0001 captures the remaining save point in a jar before heading out with 0003, Amoria, and Karkata to explore some more before the Drow Pimp shows up again. 0001 then throws the save point at him, exporting the Drow Pimp and Amelia to the real world. 0003, incredibly frustrated, goes on a sarcastic tirade against his current party before accidentally wishing himself transported to a different timeline. He then vanished, and Karkata was sucked back into her lamp. Orange Timeline At some point on this timeline, 0003 and Amoria are created, and after undisclosed shenanigans, they find Amelia, who was sent back to their timeline from the Purple Timeline, where she made a careless wish while possessed by the Drow Pimp. She reveals she has been trapped in between timelines, where she learned the awful truth; that they are all characters in a video game, all while flipping back and forth between her own personality and the Drow Pimp's. Later in the timeline, their timeline intersects with the Blue Timeline. It is unknown what happened to Amelia during this time. Purple Timeline After wishing for Amelia to come back to life at any point where she is dead, Karkata and Amelia are transported to the Purple Timeline, where they see a dead 0004 and a dead Adrowia wearing clothes which somehow look familiar to her. Amelia puts one the clothes, and then becomes possessed by the Drow Pimp. The Obviously Heterosexual Genie, out of spite, reverses one of the party's wishes, specifically the one saying that goblins will be switched with magic lamps, switching out a nearby goblin for the Blue Genie. Karkata wishes for UNLIMITED POWER, turning her into a genie. The Blue Genie then reveals that that wish has released him/her, and that Karkata is now to be sucked back into the lamp, where she will become the genie of Amelia?DP. Amelia?DP, excited over this revelation, carelessly wishes that it was earlier so she had more time to screw around before the end of the universe, a wish which Kakata grants, sending Karkata back to the Blue Timeline, and leaving Amelia trapped between timelines for two weeks before ending up in the Orange Timeline. Brown Timeline 0005 is created, to surprising everyone without exception. He became a Ninja, and promptly cleared the first room faster then any before him. He then met 0003, who had just been teleported away from the Blue Timeline. Yellow Timeline Not much is known about this timeline, except for that it will, at some point before the world ends but after the Pimp arrives, intersect with the Brown Timeline. Category:Story